Homeschooling was not one of those things that I always knew that I would do. While I had always loved the idea of homeschooling, I wasn’t sure I could handle the day to day demands of homeschooling while raising a young toddler and preschooler and then there was that all consuming questions of socialization. My oldest son went to kindergarten in the public school system and while he loved it and I liked his teacher, many of the things he learned were below his skill level and some things, I found, had to be re-taught at home after school. Life events during the summer between kindergarten and first grade gave our family reason to reconsider our schooling choices and in the end we settled on a happy medium – homeschooling through a charter school program.

Why We Decided to Homeschool

Shortly before my son finished his kindergarten year, our family went through some drastic changes. My husband lost his job, I found myself unexpectedly pregnant, our baby was born too early and passed away not long after birth, we sold our house, moved into my parent’s basement, and my husband graduated with his MBA.

I found myself dragging my feet enrolling my son in what would have been his new school. After experiencing so much change in such a short period of time, I was hesitant to put my son in a new school only to pull him out in a few months when my husband had (hopefully) found a new job.  I wasn’t satisfied with the quality of the education my son had received in public school – not disgusted with it, just not satisfied – and I found that as we got closer to the start of the school year, sending my 6 year old away for the entire day was really unpleasant to me. We planned to travel quite a bit as my husband looked for work and had no idea how that would work with a child in school.

After extensive thought, we decided that homeschooling was really the best fit for our situation even though it was not something we had seriously considered before. We felt the experiences he would have traveling and receiving individualized education would provide more of a benefit than spending  a few months in a classroom before switching schools.

But What About Socialization?

The question of how to provide enough social experiences for a homeschooled child was our top concern. We had no doubts about our ability to provide a quality educational experience, especially with help from a charter program, but socialization was a worry. My son has always been a little on the shy side, although I finally got smart and stopped actually telling people he was shy when he was 3 and told me he couldn’t play on the playground while other kids were there because he was shy. He did well in kindergarten but still struggled with his confidence at the end of the year.

I thought back to my own school experience as we made our decision to homeschool because shyness has always been something I’ve had to fight against as well, so I really felt for my son and I saw my school experience in a new light. I remembered bullies who made me dread going to school, peer pressure that made me feel like nobody, teachers who convinced me that I would never amount to anything and I realized that my public school experience had done as much, if not more to hurt my socialization than it had to help it.

I talked to a few of the homeschoolers I knew in the area and they directed me to homeschool groups, activities, co-ops, and classes. After only a few days I was overwhelmed by the number of options for socializing that my kids had as homeschoolers. We joined a homeschool soccer league, attended homeschool field trips, and scheduled homeschool park dates but I was still concerned that my son was not receiving the same daily interaction he would have had with other kids in the public school system. I quickly found that I didn’t need to worry. My previously shy son had discovered on his own that if he wanted friends he needed to take the initiative and take advantages of the opportunities he had to spend time with other kids. Now as we near the end of the school my son confidently walks into a group of kids of any age, tells them his name, and incorporates himself into the group seamlessly. This year I have seen things I never would have expected: my son knocking on a door to invite a neighbor’s child he had never met to play, my son jumping in to organize group activities with a group of kids he doesn’t know at a park, and my friend developing loyal friendships with the children he sees on a regular basis. Homeschooling has provided a social education of a different kind than public school could offer but my children know how to make friends and treat others with kindness. Isn’t that really what socialization is all about?

The First Time Homeschooling Experience

Homeschooling is a full time job. I knew going in that it would be hard work, but I had no idea the discipline that it would really take, day in and day out. After my son spend his kindergarten year mostly in school and playing with friends after school, I loved the chance to strengthen our bond and get to know each other all over again through homeschooling. Just like any other job though, some days are good, some days are bad. I think it is in the nature of parenthood to always question whether you are doing the right thing for your children. Children are always changing, so we, as parents, need to constantly decide whether what we are doing is working or not.

My children have had some wonderful experiences through homeschooling this year that they would not have had in the public school system. My kids learned about the desert by going on a multi-day camping trip in Moab, Utah and working through the education kit provided by the National Parks. We learned about the ocean as a family by visiting tide pools in southern California, going whale watching on an ocean boat, and exploring the ocean shore as a family. We learned about ancient Egypt by studying and reading, but also by talking to a grandfather who had spent time in Egypt and had a large collection of items from Egypt that my children could see and touch.

When I tell people that I am homeschooling my children, I get a lot of mixed reactions. I’ve had people tell me what a wonderful education my kids must be getting by having one-on-one attention from a mom with previous teaching experience and I’ve had people tell me I’m going to turn my kids into nerds.  Overall, I’ve been surprised at how accepting most people have been of our decision and we trust that we have made the right choice for our family at this time in our lives. As a first time homeschooler, it has definitely been a learning process but we’ve learned along the way that you can really create a homeschool that is customized to fit the needs of your families and the individual development of your children. At this point, I don’t know if we will homeschool forever. I guess, like everything else that comes with parenting, we’ll take it one day at a time.